Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Top 10 List: You Know You Are a Writer When...

Post by Kerrie
10. You know you are a writer when it is impossible for you to read a book without a red pen in hand, so you can edit the already published and edited book.

9. You know you are a writer when you go to set the table and you find ideas you had jotted down on a napkin—a cloth napkin.

8. You know you are a writer when you dread facing the blank computer screen so much that you you’d rather pick the grime out of your stove with a toothpick, then sit down and start writing.

7. You know you are a writer when you get an email from an editor or agent in your inbox and you act like you are watching a horror movie and close your eyes, click open, then put your hands in front of your face and slowly spread your fingers out just enough so there is a tiny opening to read the email.

6. You know you are a writer when you find yourself saying, “Gee Beth, I’m sorry your dog died in that freak accident, can I write a story about it?”

5. You know you are a writer when you move your bed into the dining room and your computer into your bedroom, so you can claim your bedroom as a home office on your taxes.

4. You know you are a writer when you eagerly anticipate the release of the new Writers Markets and then when you do get it, you reverently place it next to the family bible.

3. You know you are a writer when you become so engrossed in your writing that you constantly embarrass your children because you’re still in your pajamas when you pick them up from school.

2. You know you are a writer when your fictional characters become so real that you start adding them to your prayer list.

1. You know you are a writer when you walk into your bedroom at night and your spouse has set the mood-candles, music- for a romantic evening and you say, “Not tonight honey, I am on a roll and I’ve got to keep writing!”


I am looking for humor blog posts about writing (doesn't have to be in a 10 ten list format, it just has to be funny.). The carnival will run on Wednesday June 30. Send me your links by June 25th. 

Please include: 1 sentence about the post, your name and the permalink to that post. Send to kerrie[at]


Eric W. Trant said...


o You call to address a charge on your toll tag and you ask the operator to spell her name because it sounds cool and you might want to use it in a story later.

o You bring an extra laptop to work solely for the purpose of writing.

o You make sentences with the Word Verification letters in blogger... "In Latin, the plural for theaters is theati."

o Sometimes you spend an hour on a single-paragraph email. Getting it right.

o You proof-read other people's facebook entries, and with great difficulty refrain from pointing out their grammatical and typographical errors.

o You explain to your wife during the movie Shutter Island the literary concept of isolating your characters with both geography and the weather, and how this is the same technique used in The Shining.

o People no longer identify you as an engineer, or a father, or a husband or brother or son, nor even a moderately bad golfer. Instead, they refer to you as a writer and ask when the next story is coming out.

- Eric

Mason Canyon said...

Love the list (both of them).

Thoughts in Progress

Kerrie said...


Great additions to the list. I really like your first one. :-)

Patricia Stoltey said...

I was thinking you know you're a writer when you spend all your time making top 10 lists for your blog instead of adding words to your wip.

T.A. Northburg said...

I love these! Too funny, too true!

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